What exactly is that? Lifestyle. It appears to have a very broad spectrum. Food, fitness, clothes, even the shape of your genitals can have an effect upon your lifestyle (Don’t ask! It was a woman’s discussion programme I inadvertently wandered into 😂)

A healthy lifestyle is not smoking, not drinking too much, or at all and keeping fit, physically and mentally. That’s just for starters. If you’re not sure where to start you can join a gym, or at least you could before they shut them all two weeks ago.😂

You could buy a book, read articles or even engage an expert who will put you through hell as part of a rigorous training regime. If you want to stop smoking you can ‘Vape.’ Although people are now drowning because of the moisture sitting in their lungs from vaping.

I read an article the other day that said if you stop smoking over 60 years-old you have less chance of dying, hmmm a curious statement. I wonder if they missed a bit?

You can get a personal shopper and I guess they dress you. You can also get a dietician who tells you what to eat and drink.

Now you’ll have forgive me here but didn’t we used to call these people mummy?

Posted in Humour, Life, Lifestyle, Opinion | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Dear Lord, He’s Back!

Everything was going swell (do you like that? A little word thrown in there for my american cousins) Anyaways, life was great. I rejoined the gym last Thursday and I’ve been doing cross-country in the dark on Wednesday evenings with some friends. Cross-country in the dark is amazing, until you get lost in the forest. This particular evening it was just myself and the three girls. I did hope wonder if it was a preconceived plan to lure me in there alone but it wasn’t.

Of course this Thursday they have closed the gyms and locked us down for a month. I am one of those lucky people who isn’t affected by such things, ce la vie, as they say. But I am concerned for those who are affected and hope it is only a four week lock-down. Although I have to say after spending years (and I mean years lol) running and training alone I have become very fond of the company. The Princess is of an opinion that it’s females I am predominately surrounding myself with and makes overtones about Charlie’s Angels.

There’s a certain amount of truth in this, I’ve always preferred the company of girls. It started in the infants, they don’t smell, pick their nose, spit, punch you in the face when they’re drunk or flick their towel at your genitalia in the changing rooms. I’ve always found them to be rather pleasant company too.

I suppose I had better get back to the title? I know, I have digressed, it’s not old age I’ve always done it. You must be wondering by now? Well it’s Sooty, yes he’s decided if we’re going into lock-down he’s moving back in! Last night was his first night and he was quite keen to do some cross-country in the dark. If you’ve ever considered doing something similar with a small fluffy bear I would advise against it!

So there you are, you lovely people. Stay safe, stay healthy, be kind to one another and if you are in the USA, I hope the officials have remembered how to count by now xxxx

Posted in Athletics, Blogging, Community, Humour, Life, Opinion, Relationships, Running, Women | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 31 Comments

My Last Time

Nope, this isn’t one of those posts either, although it could have been in a hotel room😂. It’s been a funny old year. Last winter I trained hard, only to get one go at it and now I have to start winter training all over again. It can be so frustrating but at least I got some release last Sunday. When, eventually, I do get to perform, I can take solace in the fact, I will be well prepared. I’m talking road races here… where are you?

So last Sunday saw the running of the Haltemprice 10k. It’s pronounced Holtemprice, by the way… I dunno it’s just what I’m told… the wonders of the English language. I did wonder how 300 runners could do a 10k road race and maintain social distancing (incidentally it should be called, anti social distancing? I miss my cuddles!!)

But it was so well organised there were no distancing issues, we started in 3’s at five second intervals. Of course you need a large field/area close to the start for a holding pen. Anyaways this was my second and final chance this year and after all the setbacks with the Achilles I was fairly happy

The main point was I got to see so many old running comrades, mainly from parkrun, still cancelled after all this time. Funny but the old adage is so true, ‘You never miss it until it’s gone.’

So, a happy Sunday morning with a 5k PB at 22:23 and a second fastest 10k. A great run with Jo my adorable running partner and importantly, a lovely time with lovely friends, now that’s got to be good for your mental health? Be safe you lovely people. 😍😍xxx

Posted in Athletics, Blogging, Community, Humour, Life, Opinion, people, Relationships, Running | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 43 Comments

My First Time

Yeah, like I’m really going to put that up here, although for those that are curious it was at the rear of Morrison’s supermarket by the bins. 😉 Oh! we had such class in the 70’s! Nope this is my first 10k race since the Achilles nonsense, it appears to be improving. So I’m hoping to comeback faster, stronger and fitter… hmm! Although there are some who say my footwear was to blame, I’m not so sure 😉

They have organised a 10k race in Hull called the Haltemprice 10k with up to 500 runners. If your worried about social distancing its okay we set off in three’s at five second intervals. Obviously we 500 will not get close to one another during the 6 mile run. Okay maybe we’re invoking the rule of Trump here. I do mean Donald not the noise I make during Pilates by the way.

I’m nearly ready, the safety pin check has been carried out. For the uninitiated these are for pinning the number to your vest not for the nappy but I guess I’m not to far away from that one? I used to watch the first Rocky film before a run (don’t ask) Later I switched to Chariots of Fire. These days it should probably be Grumpy Old Men 😂

Anyaways I’ve got my lovely running partner, Jo to keep me company, now I can strongly recommend running with a younger woman. There again I can strongly recommend doing anything with a younger woman. 😘 I have my race number already, Yoga commences straight after this post and it’s carb loading Pizza for tea (dinner to you posh lot). Enjoy your weekend you lovely people and keep safe.

Posted in Blogging, Humour, Life, Motivation, Opinion, Relationships, Running, Sport, Yoga | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 29 Comments

Wild in the Country Day 2

The majesty of the wilds encourages you to reconsider values. These rocks, these meadows, along the coastline, formed between 200 and 145 million years ago, are totally untouched by our present situation. They don’t care if we have a bad day at work lol.

There are dinosaur fossils on the beach and yet some of us become irate if we miss an episode of Eastenders. Anyaways here we were on our trek. There was a plan but as I have said before it usually goes to pot.

We spot a couple looking at a sign post and someone says, ‘Which way are you headed?’ I stare at the Princess in disbelief. They tell us they are heading for Robin Hoods Bay. ‘So are we and it’s that way,’ states the royal one. As we move off they shout that they will follow us. I smile. Good luck with that, my sense of direction is not brilliant.

Some months ago I entered The Drop. Basically they blindfold you, drop you 15 miles from the center of York and you run back. No map, no phone, no assistance whatsoever. The following day I overheard the Princess on the phone asking if you still had to wait seven years before proclaiming a missing person as deceased!!

On route we discovered the Alum Works, now this took a bit of figuring out. Me? I thought it was Aluminium lol. Apparently it was used to repair dye in clothes and was the birthplace of the English chemical industry and with the arrival of synthetics it was abandoned, so there y’go

Anyaways I digress… we managed about fourteen kilometres reached Robin Hoods Bay, got back safely and did actually see the aforementioned couple in the hotel that night.

I must say though, if you go to the Bay call in at Barkers ice cream shop they do chocolate shots from a fountain, OMG I think I bounced home.

I’m not doing Day 3 as it was another longish walk in the opposite direction and it rained nearly all day. I think were depressed enough without blog posts where people get soaked and covered with mud… Needless to say it was great to be away from it all. Keep safe you lovely, lovely people and remember every new beginning has to have an ending. xx

Posted in Blog, Blogging, Freedom, History, Humour, Life, Lifestyle, Opinion | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 31 Comments

In The Wild Country (Day One)

There is a place where the wild things go, so they tell me. Possibly just another myth but if it exists I’ve found a few of them over the years. So, after months of media scaremongering with if’s, but’s and maybe’s, coupled with a billion theories on the present situation which no one has a clue about, we made a decision. “Off to the moors,” we cried. I booked us into the Raven Hall Hotel, Ravenscar, which straddles a cliff edge overlooking the North Sea.

Exploration began immediately (I was rather keen to get back before nightfall) We decided on a short walk, although the Princess and I never achieve this, due to our loss of concentration and constant banter 😂

It soon became evident we were not alone, although I’m not sure these could be classed as ‘wildlife,’ the horse was friendly as were the young bulls but after spotting Daddy we decided against crossing the field 🥴

After chatting away for nearly two hours and eventually checking the map, it was evident that we were going to have to cover 6 miles (10k) and climb the equivalent of 90 sets of stairs (according to Garmin), so we headed back. The long walk was supposed to be tomorrow!

As we approached the hotel from a different angle we debated on the castle structure which we hadn’t noticed before. The Princess thought it was Roman whereas I with my vast reading of Bernard Cornwell novels knew it to be Norman. We were a little disappointed to find out it was in fact built by the Reverend Dr Willis in the 1800’s There were some great views of the sea, once inside and of course every castle should have a reclining Princess! 😂

So, the first day of exploration done, we headed to our room to prepare for a night of good food, wine and merriment. But I wasn’t expecting the view of Robin Hoods Bay from our hotel room window which strangely enough was our hiking aim for the morrow, gee it looks a long way. I hope you all had a lovely weekend my friends 🙏❤️

Posted in Blogging, Freedom, Humour, Life, Lifestyle, nature | Tagged , , , , , , | 34 Comments

Some’at f’nowt

Or as you posh people say, ‘something for nothing.’ I was always told as a kid that you’ll never get “some’at f’nowt.” But, as I have aged I realise that isn’t necessarily true. Inspiration and motivation is free. But today it’s everywhere, blogs, tweets, FB and LinkedIn posts but I do wonder if you can have too much, so you become anesthetized to them?

We now have this stuff all over college. We even have it on the stair risers. I often imagine kids falling down the stairs as they read these wonderful messages of encouragement. “All it takes is a leap of faith.” Call me cynical but should that be on a stairwell? 😉

I noticed as I walk to the canteen there is a poster of a girls midriff and, let’s just say she is carrying a little weight. The message is concerning obesity and diabetes. Okay, great message… I guess – but what about the girl with an eating disorder who is heading for lunch? Well it’s okay because two yards further on there is another poster advertising doughnuts six for the price of three and of course their biggest selling product is cheesy chips. Dear lord… Be safe, be healthy my friends xx

Posted in Blogging, Humour, Life, Lifestyle, Opinion | Tagged , , | 23 Comments

Are You Naughty?

I’ve been called ‘Naughty’ many times. Obviously to spare the innocent I couldn’t possibly recant them all, Dick Emery springs to mind😂 Our illustrious leader has told us not to be naughty, fat chance there Toryboy. So it looks like we’ll have soldiers on the streets with cattle prods very soon.

Personally I’m quite happy to keep 2 metres away from most people, of course that’ll depend upon their gender (now some would say that’s naughty)

The Princess calls me naughty on a regular basis, my female work colleagues do the same. Apparently I have a glint in my eye (I’m a bit proud of that; it’s genetic) My dad had 6 brothers and from the stories I was told as a nipper they were all naughty.

We can probably blame my grandad, as far back as the 50’s, as an old man, he was at it. My grandma was very religious and when, one day she invited the vicar to tea, grandad put a whoopee cushion on his seat. When the vicar sat down and the inevitable happened, grandad asked him if he had digestion problems 😂. There was a very attractive school ma’am in the village and somehow he always managed to be in the garden when she cycled home, stopping her for a little ‘chat’😉

Of course in today’s society naughtiness is now deemed as inappropriate or it’s classed as a syndrome and children are given drugs to control it, something akin to the lobotomies dished out years ago. Grandad would probably be arrested today for stalking and the vicar would sue him for causing irreversible stress and trauma. As for me? I’ll just Carry On Regardless and let them class me as senile. What about you? Are you naughty? 😘 Keep safe my friends!

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Seaside, Smugglers, a Dragon or the Devil

There is something quite romantic about white horses, not the majestic, virile stallions. I mean the oceanic type, whipped up by the breeze. Although I’m sure there are a few mares who would disagree. Today we went to Filey and strangely enough i don’t recall going before.

I wanted to try out my new Triathlon suit… no I’ve never done one but my running partner believes I should and so the the Princess bought me a suit… go figure? I guess it’s just easier to do as your told. I want to go Cave Diving but apparently that’s too dangerous lol. So, back to Filey apparently it was rife with smugglers and Filey Brigg, below, was either created by the Devil who, during his creation, dropped his hammer in the sea when he plunged his hand in to retrieve it; he caught a fish instead. He called out ‘Ha Dick.’ Which is how the Haddock got it’s name and the distinctive marks on the Brigg were created by the Devil. Alternatively the Brigg is the actual remains of a Dragon. When it created mayhem in the area and was finally drowned by the townsfolk when it dived into the sea to wash parkin from its teeth. Maybe the people in Game of Thrones should have given Khaleesi some parkin and solved all their problems!

Notice there were no references to the Princess 😉 The smuggling went on for 150 years up and down the East Coast but I was a bit disappointed to find out a lot of it was tea! Saltburn had an underground passage with an entrance below the stable of a horse. The horse would kick anyone it didn’t know. There was a hollowed-out beam in a Filey pub and a church crypt in Hornsea that kept some unholy secrets. But it was a good walk and I got Fish and Chips even if I didn’t get a Triathlon suit trial xx

Posted in Blogging, History, Humour, Life, Travel | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

A Marshall but no Badge

Once again it seems I am to stand and encourage sweating, heaving bodies battle their way to ecstasy. Although my lump has now become quite hard I really don’t think it could cope with Sunday’s mass gathering. So I will marshall the Virtual Great North Run as part of the Beverley Westwood parkrun and rest the Achilles’ tendon.

Still it will be a good morning for everyone else but I’m a teensy weeny bit jealous. The countryside is fab. I know because I walked the route today. There are some great places where you could put your foot down! Still, there’s always next year 😉

Not my most exciting post but if you’ve read the past ones you know I’m busy helping my buddy get her house done whilst fighting off the sex workers 😂

Posted in Blog, Blogging, Humour, Life, Opinion, people, Running | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 28 Comments