Somewhere Else For Christmas

A drop of sweat seeps into your eye and combined with the oil starts to burn, the prickly heat on your arm is driving you mad and you can’t scratch your undercarriage because the Greek woman with her three children have camped in front of you; roughly ten feet from your groin. The kids keep staring at you and they all seem to be called Ella. The princess tells me ‘ella’ means ‘here,’ but Google says it means ‘she,’ hmmm? Meanwhile another child, Charlie (he just had to be didn’t he?) is jumping in the pool, climbing out and jumping in again. Everytime he does this he calls to his mom to watch, but she is engrossed in conversation with the Lifeguard, who probably once did the Diet Coke ad and is ignoring Charlie’s calls.

The Greek children are teasing each other and screaming whilst ignoring their mom who shouts ‘ella!’ possibly twice a minute. Despite all this I drift off to sleep and begin to dream – I have been incarcerated in a lunatic asylum, but I plan to escape during a volleyball game, suddenly a loud shout shatters the dream. I open my eyes, disorientated, the sweat and oil, is by now,  burning holes into my pupils. Standing directly above my sunbed a member of our ‘entertainment team’ is crying out, ‘Volleyball! last call for volleyball!’ It is at this point that Santa, who arrived some hours ago on a Camel, now walks down the beach, climbs on a windsurfer, waves goodbye to the children and sails away. The greek children begin to cry, their mom shouts, ‘ella, ella.’ Charlie shrugs and jumps in the pool, shouting for his mom to watch, but mom goes to play volleyball with the Diet Coke lifeguard and I wonder if Christmas in Hurghada was such a good idea 🙂

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About charliecountryboy

Carpenter and Carpentry Lecturer. Writer, 5k and 10k runner, musician. Curious about life and all those wonderful people in it.
This entry was posted in Christmas, Humour, Life, Opinion, Travel and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

52 Responses to Somewhere Else For Christmas

  1. Yeah, doesn’t sound like a fun time.😁🙏

    Liked by 4 people

  2. Ana Daksina says:

    Never have been partial to that place as a vacation destination. Prefer Gitmo. 🤣

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Invisibly Me says:

    Hahah this is priceless! I snorted a few times during this, especially the part about Santa arriving on a camel and climbing on a windsurfer to bugger off. Thanks for the giggles! MERRY CHRISTMAS 🎄
    Caz xx

    Liked by 4 people

  4. You write with a fantastic sense of humour, Charlie. I love this post, made me smile.

    Liked by 4 people

  5. PS watch out for the currents there.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Carolyn Page says:

    Hahaha… Or should that be: HoHoHo?
    Charlie your sense of humour is wonderful. I’m grinning from ear to ear!
    Merry Christmas to you and the Princess. 🙂
    xoxoxo

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you Carolyn and I hope you and Keith also enjoy your Christmas with the little one 😀 I did make an error though, this was a couple of years ago which I omitted to say, now everyone thinks I’m basking in the sunshine whilst I am in fact staring at grey northern skies 😞 Loved your ‘Negativity’ posts, I must go back and read them again Winter is a dark time for me 😘

      Liked by 2 people

  7. Cherryl says:

    Love the beach banter – have a lovely Christmas 😊🌴🍸

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Rudolph put out to pasture? Charlie, you are a treasure. I loved this.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. markbialczak says:

    Thanks for the alternate Santa setting, Charlie. Merry to you.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. kyleoyier says:

    Nice post and merry Christmas

    Liked by 2 people

  11. I giggled a few times…lol. Happy holidays!

    Liked by 3 people

  12. ChecheWinnie says:

    Hahahahaha, your sense of humour is one of a kind. Have a merry Christmas.

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Rekha Sahay says:

    Merry Christmas!! I loved the way you explained your trip. Enjoy !!!!

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays 🎄🎅🎁

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Ana Daksina says:

    Merry Christmas, you!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Cool post 👻🙀😾😹😹 & Happy holidays 🍫❄️🎁🎁

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Sweet post. You’re such a fun person to be with. Hope you had a Merry Christmas.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Years ago I got sunburned whilst barbecuing by the swimming pool. Enjoyable but my pasty white puritan streak tells me it isn’t right. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Best wishes from ALL OF US IN WIZZYMED POWER INTERNATIONAL to you and your family members this Christmas season and a Glorious New Year In Advance

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Haha. I think Christmas in Hurghada was interesting. This article made my day!

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Lara/Trace says:

    You made me giggle, you goofball.

    Like

  22. Sir, I have nominated you for Mystery blogger award. Please check my website,🙏🙏

    Like

  23. hahaha many years ago I spent time on a greek beach..

    Liked by 1 person

  24. ilonapulianauskaite says:

    great idea🎅

    Liked by 1 person

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