When Christmas Came Early

Your heart is beating so hard you can hear it thundering in your chest, but the hunt is almost over and your prey is within touching distance – the heat is so intense, sweat is cascading down your back.

Yes my friends this was me as a seven year old crawling into my Mom’s airing cupboard, hunting for yet another elusive Christmas present. I generally hunted out all my Christmas presents long before the old guy in the red suit turned up and drained my Dad’s whisky glass. One year they bought me a Scalextric. My parents were good, loving people – trusting , you know? So they hid the Scalextric under my bed. I discovered it two weeks before ole’ white beard was due and formed a cunning plan. I retired early every night (without being told, then eventually ordered) Keeping it under the bed and with great difficulty I assembled every part and was race fit in two nights. Of course my downfall was the early retiring. Succumbing to her curiosity my dear mama decided I must be ailing with some form of sickness so she came to check on me. I had a jolly good telling off that night I can assure you.

But this was a minor setback and my powers of detection and inquisitions became legend within the family. I tried everything but waterboarding my sisters – in turn their counter surveillance techniques would put the CIA to shame. Many years later they warned every girl in every relationship, “Read Treasure Island, give him no clues or the little bastard will find them.” Then one day after an arduous Β Christmas shopping spree with a certain young lady I hit gold! We had separated to buy each other presents and upon our reunion she said, “Hold my bags for a minute I need the loo.” Really? I mean really! I couldn’t believe my luck πŸ™‚ When she returned I was euphoric, I couldn’t control myself. I grinned at her. “Love the shirt,” I said. “How did you know I liked those trousers?” I asked. ” That pullover is so me, but I kinda guessed you were getting me that book.” At which point she burst into tears. So, if you don’t want to feel like a complete heel with a sad feeling in your chest for the rest of your life, don’t go hunting for Christmas presents, I don’t, well not anymore πŸ™‚

About charliecountryboy

Part-time Carpentry Assessor. writer, runner, guitarist. Curious about life and all those wonderful people in it.
This entry was posted in Christmas, Humour, Life, Opinion, Realationships, Relationships, Shopping, Women and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

50 Responses to When Christmas Came Early

  1. Ana Daksina says:

    Awwww… Reblogging to my sister site Timeless Wisdoms

    Liked by 5 people

  2. Pingback: When Christmas Came Early – Timeless Wisdoms

  3. Living with my grandma, a great baker and candy maker, was incredible before Christmas. She baked dozens of cookies and created wonderful candies, then hid them in various upstairs hiding places. My challenge was to locate the goodies, have a piece from each tin and return the containers looking as if never touched. Yes, she eventually caught on to my shenanigans.

    Liked by 5 people

  4. Ooo! Someone must have gone straight to the Naughty List! Still, at least you came clean and came good in the end, so I guess it would be OK to sit on old Santa’s knee once again. Ten out of ten for honesty! Great post – made me smile.

    Liked by 5 people

  5. Sweet memories! Thirteen year old me found and opened my never-forgotten first curling iron.

    Liked by 5 people

  6. Rakkelle says:

    Why would you want to spoil the surprise though. I’d rather not know until Christmas morning. πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 6 people

  7. Carolyn Page says:

    You know what, Charlie; I luv ‘seeing’ the Chrissy prezzies under the tree; it’s such a sweet feeling that smacks of love and joy and listening to Christmas tunes – a wonderful time of year! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 4 people

  8. lisamb320 says:

    Oh my! I too was a Snoop at Christmas time. They would leave me alone in the house, I assumed so I’d have plenty of time.

    Liked by 5 people

  9. As kids we used to look in all the ususal hiding places at Christmas and Easter time. I can remember one Easter we found the goodies and ate them, never again because we received punishment not to be forgotten.

    Liked by 4 people

  10. Hello, Charlie. Did your “powers of detection and inquisitions” help determine your career path later in life?

    Neil S.

    Liked by 5 people

  11. Invisibly Me says:

    Hahahah!! Hiding it under your own bed, I’m not surprised you caved & got it assembled under there to have a go! Sounds like your early endeavours have followed you for life. It’s sad though that the β€˜certain young lady’ started crying after you’d peaked at what she’d bought. Lesson learned young man, lesson learned!
    Thanks for the giggles! xx

    Liked by 3 people

  12. emaginette says:

    Warning: your children won’t be any better. You might have to hire security to keep it all under wraps. hehehe

    Anna from elements of emaginette

    Liked by 3 people

  13. Haha incredible story πŸ™‚

    Liked by 3 people

  14. Cracking post. Reminded me of when I would go hunting for presents. I hate it when people do it now, so I understand why she was upset.

    Liked by 3 people

  15. Whoa…can’t believe she left the bags with you! #rookie

    Liked by 2 people

  16. Great memories… πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Cherryl says:

    Great post!! I think my mum must have buried mine presents in the back garden or some other fail safe location until Christmas because I could never find them lol πŸ˜†πŸŽ

    Liked by 2 people

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