So here I am still alive and kicking after my first week as a Carpentry Lecturer in a Further Education College. The first two days were pure induction, now you know I’m not one to pick fault but really? All the teacher training I have done to date (and that’s not a lot) emphasises ‘students are not empty vessels’. Obviously teachers and lecturers are. Where was my diverse lesson? Where was my differentiation? Why have I just been assaulted by numerous Heads of Departments with a torrent of information none of which I remember because they did not, ‘ensure that learning had taken place’? It’s ok my colleagues on
my wing department put me right.
The students, sweet sixteen and never been kissed? Hardly, was I really like that when I was sixteen? They have more mood swings than a pregnant Albanian (if you’re Albanian you’ll know what I mean if you’re not and you go to Albania keep away from the pregnant women). I realise that teenagers need a lot of sleep, but guys, does it have to be in my theory lesson?
To be fair it went well for a man who had no lesson plan, no confidence and at one point no classroom, which had been taken over by the External Verifier.This seemed to cause a lot of head scratching, ‘Oh, what to do with the Yorkshire geezer and his bunch of construction boys’.
I suggested in my best, ‘Pride of Miss Jean Brodie’ voice that, “I’ll take my boys to the park, after all we are the creme de la creme”. After some serious discussions out of our earshot we were dispensed to the library. Twelve, hormonal, male, trainee carpenters in a library? Oh boy did we have fun! They won’t take my room away again in a hurry .